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{{q|Let the democracy begin!|Condoleeza Rice on the arrival of the zombie Bush administration}}
 
{{q|Let the democracy begin!|Condoleeza Rice on the arrival of the zombie Bush administration}}
   
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'''Zombies''' are black people subspecies of humans which are the byproduct of any physical, metaphysical, or metalengual process which perverts the natural death process of the individual by allowing the decaying corpse to walk amongst the still breathing to fulfill the needs of the lower brain to feast upon the flesh and brains of the living. Zombies are one of the seven most powerful peoples on earth, along with Gunslingers, Ninjas, Pirates, Robots, Vikings and the Irish. Their main food is the south American squirrel horse ( though zombies have been around for so long , sadly, they have become extinct)so they have adapted to eat humans and 42 day old German puppies. They are really freaky ing s, as if they were related to Michael Jackson or someone like that. Avoid at all costs! they can only be killed by removing the head, or destroying the brain. Got that, bitch? Hell knows your gonna need it..... Although technically undead, zombies can still function relatively well in society by taking on odd jobs and becoming ditch-diggers, fancy rave club DJ, television game show hosts, Secretary of Homeland Security, politicians,babysitters, or workers in almost any service industry. It is suspected that the leaders of the United Kingdom and the United States are both mere zombies, controlled by some more powerful source...
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'''Zombies''' are black people subspecies of humans which are the by of any physical, metaphysical, or metalengual process which perverts the natural death process of the individual by allowing the decaying corpse to walk amongst the still breathing to fulfill the needs of the lower brain to feast upon the flesh and brains of the living. Zombies are one of the seven most powerful peoples on earth, along with Gunslingers, Ninjas, Pirates, Robots, Vikings and the Irish. Their main food is the south American squirrel horse ( though zombies have been around for so long , sadly, they have become extinct)so they have adapted to eat humans and 42 day old German puppies. They are really freaky ing s, as if they were related to Michael Jackson or someone like that. Avoid at all costs! they can only be killed by removing the head, or destroying the brain. Got that, bitch? Hell knows your gonna need it..... Although technically undead, zombies can still function relatively well in society by taking on odd jobs and becoming ditch-diggers, fancy rave club DJ, television game show hosts, Secretary of Homeland Security, politicians,babysitters, or workers in almost any service industry. It is suspected that the leaders of the United Kingdom and the United States are both mere zombies, controlled by some more powerful source...
   
 
Zombies are driven by an unnatural, evil hunger to consume the living that originates, presumably, from some source of boundless evil such as Hell, Satan, or Oprah. They walk the Earth because there is simply no more room left in Hell; this is a result the into Hell because of "those damn dirty Americans" and "the needle dick Chinese" are stealing all of the good jobs there and putting immense stress on the demonic economy. As Heaven also began refusing souls (see: The Too-Many-People-Are-Dying-With-Dark-Colored-Skin-Thanks-To-Natural-Disasters Act of 1974), this forced the undead to wander forever in torment in the streets and alleys of ordinary society and vacation in Detroit. A recent Pete Rose autograph session near the Video Arcade on the south Strip lends credibility to increasing reports of zombie sightings in Las Vegas. Initially, the reaction of most people was to shoot and/or burn zombies on sight, but eventually a tense truce was reached between the two groups and zombies are now allowed to live a relatively normal existence. While the death toll of zombies has been increasing in recent years, most consider it to be balanced out since those who are killed by zombies usually become zombies themselves, thus adding to the zombie workforce. Since zombies only require human brains to exist, food supplies and other resources are greatly preserved, and human brains are relatively easy to acquire by simply harvesting the young children of Third World countries, or other undesirables such as intellectuals, teachers, Democrats, your mom, motor vehicle division clerks, and lawyers. Their least favorite treat though would happen to be the Republicans, whom they sympathize with as their fellow comrades. After all, they are the only thing as cool as them.
 
Zombies are driven by an unnatural, evil hunger to consume the living that originates, presumably, from some source of boundless evil such as Hell, Satan, or Oprah. They walk the Earth because there is simply no more room left in Hell; this is a result the into Hell because of "those damn dirty Americans" and "the needle dick Chinese" are stealing all of the good jobs there and putting immense stress on the demonic economy. As Heaven also began refusing souls (see: The Too-Many-People-Are-Dying-With-Dark-Colored-Skin-Thanks-To-Natural-Disasters Act of 1974), this forced the undead to wander forever in torment in the streets and alleys of ordinary society and vacation in Detroit. A recent Pete Rose autograph session near the Video Arcade on the south Strip lends credibility to increasing reports of zombie sightings in Las Vegas. Initially, the reaction of most people was to shoot and/or burn zombies on sight, but eventually a tense truce was reached between the two groups and zombies are now allowed to live a relatively normal existence. While the death toll of zombies has been increasing in recent years, most consider it to be balanced out since those who are killed by zombies usually become zombies themselves, thus adding to the zombie workforce. Since zombies only require human brains to exist, food supplies and other resources are greatly preserved, and human brains are relatively easy to acquire by simply harvesting the young children of Third World countries, or other undesirables such as intellectuals, teachers, Democrats, your mom, motor vehicle division clerks, and lawyers. Their least favorite treat though would happen to be the Republicans, whom they sympathize with as their fellow comrades. After all, they are the only thing as cool as them.

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